172 elixer life Recipes

  • Christmas With Louise
    christmas with louise and
    14 More
    christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house
    15 ingredients
  • Ten Commandments Of Home Rule
    respect and love, life
    5 min, 2 ingredients
  • Chicken Tacos with Mango-Avocado Salsa
    garlic powder, paprika, onion powder, ground red pepper and
    11 More
    garlic powder, paprika, onion powder, ground red pepper, salt, divided, skinless, boneless chicken breast halves, olive oil, diced peeled mango, diced peeled avocado, chopped tomato, chopped onion, chopped fresh cilantro, fresh lime juice, minced jalapeno pepper, brown rice tortillas (such as food for life)
    15 ingredients
  • Long Life Noodles
    fresh asian-style wheat noodles and
    12 More
    fresh asian-style wheat noodles, shaoxing (chinese rice wine) or dry sherry, hoisin sauce, cornstarch, dark soy sauce, oyster sauce, low-sodium soy sauce, sugar, canola oil, divided, chopped napa (chinese ) cabbage, minced garlic, green onions
    13 ingredients
  • Poppin' Cereal Bars
    popped popcorn, life cereal, pretzels and
    3 More
    popped popcorn, life cereal, pretzels, m & s brand chocolate candies, divided, marshmallows, butter, cubed
    15 min, 6 ingredients
  • I-think-i-was-latino-in-a-past-life Salsa I-think-i-was-latino-in-a-past-life Salsa
    tomatoes, coarsely chopped, garlic cloves, chopped in half and
    7 More
    tomatoes, coarsely chopped, garlic cloves, chopped in half, fresh cilantro, coarsely chopped, jalapeno, diced, bell pepper, diced, red onion, diced, olive oil, juice of 1/4 to 1/2 fresh lime, salt and pepper to taste
    9 ingredients
  • Real Life Lasagna Real Life Lasagna
    lasagna noodles (for 4 cups broken ), lean ground beef and
    8 More
    lasagna noodles (for 4 cups broken ), lean ground beef, olive oil or cooking spray - i used, onion chopped - i subbed frozen chopped onion, minced garlic, italian seasoning - i used a blend of oregano ,basil, pepper & garlic salt because i didn tsp have any pre-blend, chopped or diced tomatos- i used 1 28 oz can, tomato paste (6oz), low fat cottage cheese, already shredded mozerella cheese .
    20 min, 10 ingredients
  • Todays Breakfast Todays Breakfast
    wake up, stretch, wipe sleep from eyes and
    19 More
    wake up, stretch, wipe sleep from eyes, throw on white mens shirt ,collar up, slip into blue jeans,ones with fewer holes, step into the white tennis shoes, run brush thou hair, jump in car, drive to grocery store, walk to the frozzen food section, nod to the 1 person you wished did nt see you in this ruffled mess, look at the slections, no,yes,no, what the heck, take them all, pay for purchase, drive home, pop toaster strudel in toaster, enjoy, life is short ,enjoy it all,even if it s only the different flavors of toaster strudels, hope you all have a great day
    3 min, 22 ingredients
  • Hi All Hi All
    know how many of you remember me. i was a very regular po...
    1 ingredients
  • Sauted Baby Spinach With Mushrooms Sauted Baby Spinach With Mushrooms
    pack of baby spinach, sized garden mushrooms and
    6 More
    pack of baby spinach, sized garden mushrooms, garlic or 3/4 tsp ready to use minced garlic, olive oil, tomatoes (sliced into semis or halves), frozen corn (preferably , bird s eye brand), microwaved., soy tenders (light life)
    15 min, 8 ingredients
  • Jjs New Great Niece Jjs New Great Niece
    i would invite any and all friends here to send a real em... and
    8 More
    i would invite any and all friends here to send a real email to my niece with a message like this or your own words congratulations on your new daughter, a friend of jj s . i think seeing lots of emails will show her how much love there is in the world. thank you if you chose to do this. the mother is bracha and the father is yoni. just found out she was 7 lb, healthy and curly black hair. pics soon i hope. jj, gmail.com, my great nieces name is : shayna klara admoni, a recent email from my sister with what a friend sent her, very touching, dearest jj, thrilled about you and jennifer coming to visit, meanwhile , we re receiving lovely congratulation notes from friends and family on this new precious jewel in our lives. this 1 is from dear friends that live in shilo. i almost cried when i read it and wanted to share it with you., may she be a beauty in your life , may she justify all the tough times you ve managed to work your way through, and may she lead you only to beautiful things to come., love , yr lil sis
    212 hour 42 min, 9 ingredients
  • Put Some Zest Into Your Life Put Some Zest Into Your Life
    tart shells, lime custard(recipe below ), white chocolate and
    19 More
    tart shells, lime custard(recipe below ), white chocolate, cream cheese,softened, candied lime peel (homemade ), lime custard, sugar, lime zest, lime juice (fresh ), farm fresh egg yolks,(beaten ), farm fresh butter (real,no sub. please), place sugar ,zest,juice in pan over flame,bring to a boil., temper egg yolks with a small amount of the hot liquid,whisking., add egg mixture to hot juice mixture,beating until very well combined., place over same heat and (this is where you ll need good biceps), beating constantly for about 12 minutes,mixture will have the look and feeling of pudding., add chunks of butter ,a little at a time,beating constantly,until butter melts and the two mixtures are blended., pour mixture through open weave cloth ., chill for about four hours.
    25 min, 22 ingredients
  • Wild Life Soup Wild Life Soup
    chives diced at least half a cup and
    3 More
    chives diced at least half a cup, walla walla onions (1 about 3 inches in diameter) save the greens and dice them like you would chives, but just chop or chunk the wallas to thumb size piece, fresh garlic dice it fine, half cup of fried green tomato seasoning
    1 hour , 4 ingredients
  • Southwestern Turkey Burgers Southwestern Turkey Burgers
    extra lean ground turkey, red bell pepper, diced small and
    11 More
    extra lean ground turkey, red bell pepper, diced small, yellow bell pepper, diced small, green bell pepper, diced small, button mushroom diced small, egg white, quick oats, chili powder, red pepper flakes (to taste), cumin, dried cilantro, salt and pepper (to taste), light hamburger buns (such as healthy life wheat hamburger buns)
    13 ingredients
  • Carrot Cake from Life as a Loft-House Carrot Cake from Life as a Loft-House
    all-purpose flour, cinnamon, baking powder, baking soda and
    11 More
    all-purpose flour, cinnamon, baking powder, baking soda, salt, sugar, canola oil, eggs, carrots peeled and grated, coconut, powdered sugar, cream cheese, butter, vanilla extract, almond extract
    15 ingredients
  • The Story of My Life Chicken Soup The Story of My Life Chicken Soup
    bone-in, skinless chicken pieces (about 4 lb) and
    13 More
    bone-in, skinless chicken pieces (about 4 lb), minced yellow onion, diced celery, diced carrots, dried bay leaf, chicken stock , low-sodium chicken broth, or water, diced chayote or butternut squash, peeled sweet potato, diced, ears corn, cut into 1/2-inch rounds, or 1 cup fresh corn kernels, loosely packed fresh dill sprigs, serrano pepper, thinly sliced, chopped fresh cilantro, salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste, limes, cut into wedges
    2 hour , 14 ingredients
  • Best Life - Kashi Go Lean Cereal Mix Best Life - Kashi Go Lean Cereal Mix
    honey nut cheerios, kashi go lean (14.1 oz), wheat chex
    3 ingredients
  • Peanut Nuggets Peanut Nuggets
    peanut butter, butter, cubed, marshmallows, life cereal and
    1 More
    peanut butter, butter, cubed, marshmallows, life cereal, dry roasted peanuts
    15 min, 5 ingredients




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