214 elephant walks loc cambodian Recipes

christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

butter, yellow onion, chopped, leeks, chopped, elephant garlic, chopped, stalks celery, chopped, carrots, chopped, vegetable broth, tomato sauce, black beans, head chinese cabbage, cored and shredded, potatoes, dried oregano, dried basil, freshly ground black pepper, celery salt, ground cayenne pepper, bay leaves, grated parmesan cheese to taste

garlic powder, onion powder, crushed red pepper flakes, freshly cracked black pepper, pork shoulder roast, creole-style butter injectable marinade (such as tony chachere s roasted garlic & herb marinade), butter, shallots, chopped, elephant garlic, chopped, water, sweet onions (such as vidalia), peeled and quartered, red potatoes, baby carrots, stalks celery, cut into 4 pieces, freshly cracked black pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, water, dry brown gravy mix

tomatoes, quartered,seeded ,and minced fairly fine. (so they stay on the garlic bread really well!), vidalia onion, minced very fine, elephant garlic or 4 cloves regular garlic, minced very fine, chives or garlic sprouts, snipped fine to taste, extra virgin olive oil, balsamic vinegar, to taste (as we like it quite tart ), basil , to taste, oregano, black pepper

sugar, cinnamon, oil, refrigerated biscuits, butter, melted

oil, divided, beef, cut into 1 inch cubes, flour, nutmeg, chili powder, onions, sliced, minced garlic, water, red pepper (or less , to taste), tomato sauce, chunky peanut butter, peas and carrots (optional), steamed rice, hot sauce

coconut, pineapple juice, scoop vanilla ice cream, ice, pina colada nonalcoholic drink mix, whalers dark rum, raspberry puree, cream, maraschino cherry, toasted coconut

water, beer, hot pepper sauce (to taste), head elephant garlic , smashed, lemons, halved, fresh bay leaves or 4 dried bay leaves, onions, quartered, old bay seasoning, salt, kielbasa, sliced, andouille sausage, ears fresh corn, cleaned & broken into 2 (1/2 halved or 1/4 if large) or 3 lbs small potatoes (1/2 halved or 1/4 if large), live crabs, dungeness crabs, shrimp, lobsters, dozen littleneck clams

wake up, stretch, wipe sleep from eyes, throw on white mens shirt ,collar up, slip into blue jeans,ones with fewer holes, step into the white tennis shoes, run brush thou hair, jump in car, drive to grocery store, walk to the frozzen food section, nod to the 1 person you wished did nt see you in this ruffled mess, look at the slections, no,yes,no, what the heck, take them all, pay for purchase, drive home, pop toaster strudel in toaster, enjoy, life is short ,enjoy it all,even if it s only the different flavors of toaster strudels, hope you all have a great day

unsalted butter, celery ribs, diced, carrots, diced, onions, diced, leek, cleaned well and sliced, almonds, fresh dill, bay leaves, turmeric, chicken stock, wild rice, white rice, diced cooked chicken, sliced mushrooms, salt, ground black pepper

dry pink beans, bacon , cut into 1/4 inch slices, linguica sausage, red onions, chopped, elephant garlic, chopped, ground black pepper, dried savory, ground cumin, smoked paprika, kale, stemmed and chopped, chipotle chiles in adobo sauce, finely chopped

artichokes, lemons , quartered lengthwise, fresh thyme sprigs, shallots, sliced, bay leaves, dry white wine, carrot, sliced into rounds, celery stalk, sliced, olive oil, water, head of elephant garlic, cloves separated, peeled, chopped into 1/4-inch cubes, olive oil, celery root, peeled , cut into matchstick-size strips, carrots, peeled, chopped, onion, chopped, celery stalks, chopped, extra-virgin olive oil, divided, walnuts, toasted, dijon mustard, whole grain dijon mustard, sherry wine vinegar, chopped fresh chives, chopped fresh parsley

sugar, ground cinnamon, oil (for frying ), flour tortillas (7 inches)

specialty potato , preferably waxy fleshed, peeled, cut into uniform large chunks, fresh basil oil , to taste, elephant garlic cloves, roasted, roasted walla walla onion (about 1/2 cup), oil , for roasting, salt, white pepper, lemon zest, finely minced