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christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

at the time when christianity was accepted in serbia , many families were baptised and chose their own saint. this is why saint nicholas is celebrated by so many families on the 19th of december. for the orthodox families st. nicholas is a special day with special rituals and prayers, to others it only means a day to be with your family and enjoy lots of food., this st. nicholas bread is traditionally made in orthodox families for the feast of st. nicholas. i heard that in other families a coin is put in the bread and the person who gets the piece with the coin will be rich in the future. i do not believe that this is part of a religious ritual, but i can be wrong., ingredients for the bread, sugar, fresh yeast or 1 package dry yeast (7 g), lukewarm milk, kilo flour (all purpose), salt, sugar, butter, egg yolks, grated lemon peel and some lemon juice, ingredients for the braid, flour, water, little bit salt, how to make the bread, put the (fresh ) yeast in a small bowl together with a tsp sugar and a little bit lukewarm milk. mix and set aside so the yeast can start to work. yeast usually activates between 25 and 28 degrees celsius., take another bowl and beat the egg yolks, add the rest of the milk and stir well., put the flour , sugar, salt, lemon peel and a bit of lemon juice together in a bowl. add the softened butter in small pieces and knead until the mixture has a fine texture., mix the yeast mixture with the milk/egg mixture and add it to the flour. knead everything well until the dough becomes a ball (leaving the bowl clean). put the dough into another bowl, cover it with a damp cloth and put it on a warm place. let the dough rise for 2 hours., after these two hours knead the dough again (shortly) on a floured surface. make a ball again and let the dough rise again for 1 hour., form a round bread and put it on a greased baking tray or use greased baking paper. you can also use a round baking pan, don tsp forget to grease it, make the dough for the braid by mixing 250 g flour, 180 ml water and a pinch of salt together in a bowl. make a soft dough, divide it in three pieces and form 3 rolls. make a braid twice the diameter of the bread. cut the braid in half and form a cross on the bread, use a water/egg mixture to glue it on the bread., bake the st. nicholas bread in a preheated oven on 180 degrees celsius for about 60 minutes.

fresh eggs , depending on size., olive oil or butter, to coat skillet., stalk celery , remove strings and slice thin., broccoli florets, cut to small chunks , depending on size., onion, chopped ., garlic, diced fine ., basil ., butter ., tomato, small cubed, pitted and chopped kalamata olives (use basic ripe olives if you must)., fresh or dried & soaked mushrooms, chopped ., red bell pepper, chopped ., hot chilies, seeded and chopped (optional), smoked bacon, chopped ., canned escargot (depending on size and your taste), well drained., dry white wine ., corn meal ., grated swiss cheese. you can use other cheese but swiss is best ., salt & fresh ground pepper to taste.

sugar, canola oil, eggs, beaten, fresh grated carrots, all purpose flour, salt, baking soda, cinnamon, ground or grated coconut

everywhere you look , there is a lot of emphasis on cutting the fat out of our daily diets, but who wants to cut out the fat if it means cutting out the flavor when it comes to baking, there is a way to cut down on your fat intake without changing the ingredients in your favorite recipes. if you switch to nonstick silicone bakeware, you can cut down on your fat intake with minimal effort. because the bakeware is nonstick, you never have to use butter, shortening, or grease on your pans or sheets to ensure easy food removal., first silicone items made exclusively for baking were small silicone mats that fit nicely on your cookie sheet and allowed you to bake cookies with out greasing the cookie sheet or worrying about the bottoms getting burned. these little mats were a huge success and stores were hard pressed to keep them in stock., as the popularity of these mats grew , manufacturers decide to explore the idea of making more bakeware from silicone. they began making spoons, spatulas, and whisks that could withstand high heats and could be used with nonstick cookware with no fear of ruining the coating. silicone utensils were the perfect choice for candy making or any other project that required a boiling and sticky liquid to be stirred., kitchen supply manufacturers also introduced silicone potholders and oven gloves. because they can withstand heats up to 500 degrees, they are the perfect insurance that you won tsp get burned when you pull a hot dish from your oven. they don tsp conduct heat the way that a cloth potholder does and they are much sturdier and easy to keep clean than traditional potholders. home canners fell in love with silicone baker s mitts because they could actually reach into a pot of boiling water to remove a hot jar of food once it was done processing. as an added bonus these durable potholders do double duty as lid grippers making opening jars a snap., once silicone hit kitchens in the form of baking mats , utensils, and pot holders, kitchen experts began to see the potential of this material in everyday baking. suddenly almost any type of bakeware that could traditionally be found in stainless steel, aluminum, glass, or stoneware was being offered in brightly colored silicone. stores began selling muffin tins, bread loaf pans, cake pans, and pie pans. the most popular pieces tend to be the specialty designed cake pans that allow you to make cakes shaped like everything from roses to pumpkins. they even have mini cake pans that make individual, fancy shaped cakes., popularity of silicone bakeware skyrocketed as cooks began to see the benefits of using this material in their kitchens. foods pop out of silicone pans with amazing ease. you never need to grease, flour, or even use cooking spray on a silicone pan and that adds up to lots of calories and fat grams saved with each meal. because silicone is very flexible, it is easy to bend and twist it so that cakes and breads pop out easily. you never have to force baked goods out of the pan, so they retain there shape and you don tsp see a lot of split and broken cakes., silicone is a bakers dream when it comes to making evenly cooked delicacies. the material distributes heat evenly, so you never end up with a cake that is burned around the edges and still not cooked in the middle. it also cools down quickly ensuring that your foods will not continue cooking and possibly drying out once you remove them from the oven., because silicone is nonstick , cleanup is a breeze. a little soap and water and any crumb left on your bakeware disappears. it is nonporous, so it never retains any odors from the foods you cook. completely versatile it goes from oven to table to freezer and can even be thrown in the dishwasher. once you are done cleaning it, storage is a snap. with its flexibility, you can twist it, bend it, fold it or mash it up so it can fit in the smallest of drawers or cupboards., if you haven tsp tried silicone bakeware , add a piece or two to your kitchen. you will be surprised at its quality and flexibility.

olive oil, garlic finely minced, red grape tomatoes halved lengthwise and pitted, yellow grape tomatoes halved lengthwise and pitted, whole basil leaves sliced chopped whatever, whole baguette sliced, butter , you heard me... 8., balsamic vinegar or 3

avocados, peeled and pitted, sea salt, garlic powder, fresh lime juice, diced onion, roma (plum) tomatoes, diced, chopped cilantro, cayenne pepper, or more to taste (optional)

chocolate cake mix, part-skim ricotta cheese, white sugar, vanilla extract, eggs, instant chocolate pudding mix, milk

pear halves, lemon flavored jell-o, cream cheese, chopped pecans

cake, milk, drops apple cider vinegar, white sugar, brown sugar, vegetable oil, butter, melted, vanilla extract, canned pumpkin puree, all-purpose flour, rolled oats, baking powder, baking soda, ground cinnamon, ground nutmeg, chopped walnuts, cream cheese frosting, ground cinnamon

store bought puff pastry sheets , if frozen thaw in refrigerator, soft butter, ground blanched almonds, flour, eggs, sugar, almond extract, salt, powdered sugar , for dusting, egg yolk mixed with 1 tbsp water, recipes for this program , which were provided by contributors and guests who may not be professional chefs, have not been tested in the food network s kitchens. therefore, the food network cannot attest to the accuracy of any of the recipes.

yeast, warm whole milk, sugar plus 1 cup, sweet butter, plus more melted, eggs, salt, flour, cinnamon sugar, ground nuts, bitter chocolate, sugar, pre-made golden dumpling coffee cake dough, egg beaten , for egg wash, recipes for this program , which were provided by contributors and guests who may not be professional chefs, have not been tested in the food network s kitchens. therefore, the food network cannot attest to the accuracy of any of the recipes.

sugar, paprika, chili seasoning, cayenne pepper, salt, black pepper, garlic powder, rack baby back ribs, barbecue rub, apple juice in a spritzer, bbq sauce, your favorite, recipes for this program , which were provided by contributors and guests who may not be professional chefs, have not been tested in the food network s kitchens. therefore, the food network cannot attest to the accuracy of any of the recipes.

head iceburg lettuce, fresh spinach, green onions, chopped, peas, washed and drained, bacon bits, hard cooked eggs, chopped, grated cheddar cheese, parmesan cheese, sour cream, sugar, mayonnaise, recipes for this program , which were provided by contributors and guests who may not be professional chefs, have not been tested in the food network s kitchens. therefore, the food network cannot attest to the accuracy of any of the recipes.

ham, bone in, orange marmalade, coca cola classic, self-rising flour (summer wheat flour is best), vegetable shortening, milk, recipes for this program , which were provided by contributors and guests who may not be professional chefs, have not been tested in the food network s kitchens. therefore, the food network cannot attest to the accuracy of any of the recipes.

ground beef, ground pork , or substitute ground bulk sausage and eliminate seasonings, green onions, dried basil, dried oregano, salt and pepper to taste, shortening, parmesan cheese chunks 1/4-inch square, grated parmesan cheese, egg, sesame seeds, recipes for this program , which were provided by contributors and guests who may not be professional chefs, have not been tested in the food network s kitchens. therefore, the food network cannot attest to the accuracy of any of the recipes.

boneless chicken breast halves, white wine, lower sodium soy sauce, fresh ginger, grated, salt , ground black pepper, garlic powder and paprika to taste, leaf lettuce, tomatoes, sliced, seedless cucumber, sliced, radish roses, hard cooked eggs, each cut into quarters, shredded cheese of choice

marinara sauce, ground beef, wonton wrappers, mozzarella cheese shredded, parmesan cheese, ricotta cheese, fresh basil