70867 mulled fruit nut christmas cake ahead fruitcake Recipes

christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

candied cranberries : ............, fresh cranberries, washed, granulated white sugar, water, chocolate genoise, hot melted unsalted butter or clarified butter, pure vanilla extract, cake flour, unsweetened dutch-processed cocoa powder, eggs, granulated white sugar, heavy whipping cream or creme fraiche, divided, kirsch (cherry brandy), semisweet or bittersweet chocolate, coarsely chopped, water, pure vanilla extract, granulated white sugar

water, white baking chocolate, chopped, butter, softened, sugar, eggs, unsweetened applesauce, rum extract, king arthur unbleached all-purpose flour, cake flour, baking powder, baking soda, buttermilk, chopped pecans, toasted, flaked coconut, reduced-fat cream cheese, butter, softened, white baking chocolate, melted, sugar

cake flour (not self-rising), baking powder, salt, butter, divided (or margarine), sugar, divided, egg, fruit, sliced (fresh or frozen ), fresh lemon juice, ground cinnamon

ocean spray cranberries, nuts, chopped, orange rind, grated, all-purpose flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, baking soda, shortening, orange juice, egg, well beaten

lemon cake mix, flaked coconut, chopped nuts (i used almonds), margarine or 2 tbsp butter, melted, crushed pineapple, vegetable oil, eggs

fruitcake (about 1 1/4 lb), frozen blueberries, thawed, plain yogurt

thick applesauce or 2 cups canned plain pumpkin, sugar, oil, eggs, vanilla butternut flavor ( or almond or vanila ), two, flour, salt, baking soda, baking powder, apple pie spice or, pumpkin pie spice, fruit and nut mix, chopped hazelnuts, chopped pecans, dried cranberries, golden raisins, dark raisins

dried mixed fruit (blueberries, cherries, raisins, cranberries soaked overnight in rum or brandy, walnuts , chopped soak in rum overnight, rum or brandy to soak the fruit & nuts, unbleached flour, baking soda, cinnamon, salt, sugar, eggs, canola oil, bananas , overripe, mashed, vanilla

water, white chocolate baking squares, chopped, butter (softened ), sugar, eggs, unsweetened applesauce, rum extract, all-purpose flour, cake flour, baking powder, baking soda, buttermilk, pecans, chopped and toasted, flaked coconut, reduced-fat cream cheese, white chocolate baking squares, melted, butter, softened, sugar

white cake mix, cool whip (thawed ), egg, red or green food colouring, peppermint extract, powdered sugar

yellow cake mix (regular size), cold milk, instant vanilla pudding mix, macaroons, crushed, currant jelly, heavy whipping cream, sugar, vanilla extract

cake, sugar, flour, baking soda, salt, eggs, fruit cocktail, undrained (can use crushed pineapple or peaches, chopped), white sugar, cream or evaporated milk, butter, vanilla

cake, sugar, fruit cocktail, flour, salt, soda, eggs, first topping, brown sugar, coconut, second topping, chopped pecans, coconut, evaporated milk, sugar, butter or margarine, boil together for 10 minutes.

fruit cocktail with juice, lemon cake mix (may use orange or pineapple mix), vegetable oil, chopped maraschino cherries, flaked coconut, eggs, water

white cake mix, flour, oil, water, eggs, brown sugar, chopped nuts, melted butter or 1/4 cup margarine, powdered sugar, corn syrup (or golden syrup), water (or a little more)

margarine or 1/4 lb butter, softened, eggs, separated, sugar (150 g or 1/2 cup plus 3 tbsp ), flour (150 g or 1/2 cup plus 3 tbsp ), dry yeast, vanilla (or 1 tbsp sugar), milk (approximate), prepared custard (optional), fresh fruit such as strawberries (or kiwis, apricots, cherries), fruit jam mixed with a little water, to glaze (red currant, strawberry or apricot jam), freshly whipped cream, to serve

caster sugar, corn oil, eggs, milk, salt, vanilla extract, courgettes, grated, self raising flour, bicarbonate of soda, ground ginger, pecan nuts, chopped, raisins