71733 traditional christmas fruit bread kletzenbrot Recipes
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christmas with louise and14 Morechristmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house15 ingredients
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bread , torn up into small pieces (any type, dry works be... and6 Morebread , torn up into small pieces (any type, dry works better than fresh, fruit s nice, i like malted best), milk (use as much or as little to taste, any type works, i use soya but you can use normal or flavoured et), sugar or 1 tbsp splenda substitute, maple syrup (optional, if using , omit the sugar or splenda), cinnamon (optional) or 1 tsp ginger (optional) or 1 tsp mixed spice, etc (optional), raisins (optional) or 1 tbsp sultanas (optional) or 1 tbsp dried fruit, etc (optional), sugar (optional)5 min, 7 ingredients
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cubed whole grain bread and15 Morecubed whole grain bread, green apples, cored and grated with skin on, chopped dried apricot, chopped dates, golden raisin, milk , i used vanilla soy, sucanat, cornstarch, cinnamon, nutmeg, salt, milk , i used vanilla soy, sucanat, cornstarch, salt, vanilla55 min, 16 ingredients
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sultanas, currants, mixed dried fruit, coarsely chopped and16 Moresultanas, currants, mixed dried fruit, coarsely chopped, orange , juice and zest of, crushed pineapple, brandy, plus extra for finishing, blanched almonds, unsalted butter, brown sugar, eggs, vanilla essence, almond essence, ground almonds, bread flour, baking powder, ground cinnamon, mixed spice, nutmeg, brandy, extra for feeding cake (approximate)3 hour 40 min, 19 ingredients
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Traditional German Christmas Fruit Bread - Kletzenbrotdried pears, cut into 1/2-inch chunks and18 Moredried pears, cut into 1/2-inch chunks, dried figs, cut into 1/2-inch chunks, dried prunes or 1 cup dried plum, roughly chopped, raisins or 1/2 cup sultana, candied orange peel, diced, candied lemon peel, diced, kirschwasser or 1/4 cup rum, water, granulated sugar, active dry yeast, unbleached whole wheat flour, ground cinnamon, ground allspice, vanilla (or seeds scraped from 1 bean), blanched almond, roughly chopped, walnuts, broken into large chunks, hazelnuts (some may be halved, leave others whole), butter32 min, 19 ingredients
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Scandinavian Christmas Fruit Bread (Julekage) Recipeactive dry yeast, warm water (105 to 115 degrees f) and10 Moreactive dry yeast, warm water (105 to 115 degrees f), lukewarm milk (scalded , then cooled), granulated sugar, salt, ground cardamom, egg, shortening, raisins, cut-up citron or 1/3 cup mixed candied fruit, all-purpose flour, butter or 1/2 cup margarine, softened1 hour 45 min, 12 ingredients
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Peach and Ricotta Fruit Breadpeach slices in juice (natural ), cornflour and4 Morepeach slices in juice (natural ), cornflour, vanilla bean paste (or vanilla essence), ground cinnamon, fruit bread (toasted ), low-fat ricotta (fresh )15 min, 6 ingredients
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Fruit Spice Cake ( Not a Christmas Fruit Cake!!!)canned fruit , with juice (i like peaches), oil and10 Morecanned fruit , with juice (i like peaches), oil, baking soda, cinnamon, sugar, flour, salt, nutmeg, raisins (optional), walnuts (optional), coconut (optional)1 hour 15 min, 12 ingredients
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Christmas Batter Breadactive dry yeast, warm water (110o to 115o) and13 Moreactive dry yeast, warm water (110o to 115o), butter, softened, sugar, salt, ground cinnamon, ground nutmeg, king arthur unbleached all-purpose flour, chopped candied fruit, raisins, chopped walnuts or pecans, sugar, milk1 hour , 15 ingredients
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Fruit Bread Sliceday-old white bread, mixed fruit (packet), brown sugar and5 Moreday-old white bread, mixed fruit (packet), brown sugar, suet, spices, mixed, eggs, unsalted mixed nuts (optional), raw sugar1 hour 15 min, 8 ingredients
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Fruit Bread IIIwater, milk, margarine, eggs, white sugar, salt and8 Morewater, milk, margarine, eggs, white sugar, salt, ground cinnamon, ground nutmeg, bread flour, active dry yeast, lemon zest, orange zest, raisins, sliced almonds14 ingredients
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