201 thing brad Recipes

granulated garlic, cayenne pepper, dry mustard, freshly cracked black pepper, white pepper, ground cumin, chicken wings, sectioned into wings and drumettes, olive oil, minced garlic, jalapeno, minced, reserved spice mixture , from above, hot pepper sauce (recommended : crystal hot sauce), butter, white vinegar, lime juice

christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

corn, drained, black beans, drained, red bell peppers, finely chopped, grape tomatoes, green onion , finely chop whole thing, cilantro , finely chop everything but stems, limes , juice of, extra virgin olive oil, quinoa, vegetable broth, cumin , to taste, salt , to taste, pepper , to taste

boneless turkey breast, yellow hominy, black beans, diced tomatoes, water, onion, cut up, gravy , packet from the turkey (or whatever seasonings you like), brown rice, water

plain flour, rolled oats, uncooked (regular oatmeal), desiccated coconut, brown sugar, butter, golden syrup, bicarbonate of soda (same thing) or 1 tsp baking soda (same thing), boiling water

flour, unsweetened cocoa, salt, egg, with yolk, egg whites, vanilla extract, baking powder, butter, nonfat sour cream, sugar

flour (plus 2 tsp. more ), cocoa, baking soda, salt, butter, sugar, eggs, vanilla, cream cheese, softened, powdered sugar, egg, vanilla

water, cider vinegar or 3 cups white vinegar, kosher salt (preferred ) or 6 tbsp uniodized salt, sugar, texas- 1015 sweet onions, peeled,sliced 1/4 inch thick,and separated into rings, sweet red onions , fixed the same way, garlic scapes (entire thing) or 1 clove of mild garlic, peeled and quartered lengthwise

self-raising flour, margarine, caster sugar, cocoa powder, egg (beaten )

natural-style peanut butter, unsweetened dried shredded coconut, egg, sugar-free vanilla syrup

granulated garlic, cayenne pepper, dry mustard, freshly cracked black pepper, ground white pepper, ground cumin, chicken wings, sectioned, butter, unsalted, divided, minced garlic, minced jalapeno, hot pepper sauce (recommended : crystal), white vinegar, lime juice

oil for cooking, sea scallops, sour cream, chopped chives, chopped chervil, yellow tomato puree, red tomato puree, chervil, salt and pepper, tomatoes diced, white wine, salt and pepper

butter, caramels , unwrapped, evaporated milk, butter, your favorite things (granola, or non-flake cereals, toasted nuts, dried cherries, apricots, raisins, sesame or other seeds, chocolate chips, etc.)

veal tenderloin, trimmed, halved, and cut into 1-inch cubes, veal stock, salted butter, flour, sifted, plus more for dusting, white wine, mushrooms, halved or quartered depending on size, clarified butter, puff pastry , defrosted in refrigerator, egg yolk, beaten, brandy, cream, tiny shrimp, chopped parsley, black truffles, washed, dried, and finely chopped

ham, chopped scallion or onion, softened cream cheese, mayo, relish, garlic powder

shredded cheddar cheese, reduced fat cream cheese, butter, onion powder, garlic powder, chopped green chilies, baked nacho tortilla chips crushed, minced fresh cilantro, tortilla chips

ham, chopped onion or scallions, softened cream cheese, mayo, pickle relish

crab, celery finely chopped, green pepper finely chopped, scallions finely chopped, thyme leaves, cayenne pepper (more , if you like things spicy), eggs, lightly beaten, heavy cream, seasoned bread crumbs, scallions finely chopped, parsley finely chopped, garlic finely chopped, juice of 1 small lemon, tabasco sauce, creole mustard, mayonnaise, egg whites