4 going away Recipes

christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

frozen squid rings, thawed under running water (i got mine at trader joe s), flour (or less , if you think you can get away with it, just add more as you go if you start with less than), cayenne pepper, kosher salt, eggs, panko breadcrumbs (japanese bread crumbs), oil, for frying

seasonal fish and vegetables are used in tempura. the ingredients for tempura in the recipe below are only a few of the many, many common ingredients that lend themselves to this treatment. shrimp; squid; small whole fish like perch, smelt, and goby; white-fleshed saltwater fish; eggplant; green beans; onion rings; sweet potato slices; bell pepper strips; mushrooms - the list could go on for several pages. chicken, beef and pork, however, are not usually prepared as tempura because of their relatively heavier, identifiable taste. chicken and pork are deep-fried in other ways, and beef is often given a more highlighted preparation, say, in sukiyaki., http://japanesefood.about.com/od/tempura/a/cookingtempura.htm, basic steps for cooking tempura, prepare the ingredients ., make tempura batter ., heat vegetable oil in a deep pan to 340-350f degree., lightly dip ingredients in the batter and immediately fry them until crisp. it takes longer to fry vegetables than to fry seafood., drain tempura on a rack ., serve right away with tentsuyu (tempura dipping sauce) or salt. tempura is best served hot. *grated daikon radish is a common condiment., tempura batter recipe - japanese recipe, http://japanesefood.about.com/od/tempura/r/tempurabatter.htm, egg, ice water, all purpose flour, preparation, beat an egg in a bowl. add ice water in the bowl. be sure to use very cold water., add sifted flour in the bowl and mix lightly. be careful not to overmix the batter., tempura dipping sauce recipe, tempura dipping sauce is called tentsuyu in japanese. serve this sauce with tempura., dashi soup stock, mirin, soy sauce, sugar, preparation, put mirin in a pan and heat. add soy sauce and dashi soup stock in the pan. bring the sauce to a boil., tips for making crispy tempura, by setsuko yoshizuka, tip 1: ice, use ice water for the batter. this is really important to prevent the batter from absorbing too much oil., tip 2: batter (tempura batter recipe), do not make the batter ahead of time. try not to over mix the batter and not to coat ingredients with the batter too much., if you are frying both seafood and vegetables, fry vegetables first. then, fry seafood. fry vegetables at 340f degree and fry seafood at 350f degree., tip 4: oil temperature, check the temperature of frying oil , drop a little batter into the oil. if the batter comes up right away instead of sinking to the bottom of the pan, it s about 360 f degree. if the batter goes halfway to the bottom and comes up, it s about 340f degree. this is said to be the right temperature to fry tempura.