Send spouse to Alaska to capture moose, or have one delivered by UPS.
Meanwhile, melt chocolate in very large double boiler.
Keep warm.
Tie up moose with rope.
Holding the moose by the tail, carefully dip in melted chocolate, covering it completely with a thin coating.
Arrange moose attractively on large platter and refrigerate for 2 days to set chocolate.
Remove rope, wash to remove chocolate,if necessary, and return rope to clothesline.
Garnish chocolate moose with Cool Whip and top with a cherry.
Serve immediately.
Or you could just chew on the rope, which may be tastier.
May be doubled for serving a crowd.

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Nutrition Facts

Per Serving Per 100 g

Amount Per 1 Serving
Calories	11201.5 Kcal (46898 kJ)
Calories from fat	5790.01 Kcal
		% Daily Value*
Total Fat	643.33g	990%
Cholesterol	968.65mg	323%
Sodium	9485.62mg	395%
Potassium	494.91mg	11%
Total Carbs	1392.1g	464%
Sugars	809.95g	3240%
Dietary Fiber	0.02g	0%
Protein	91.15g	182%
Vitamin C	5.2mg	9%
Iron	81mg	450%
Calcium	1160.4mg	116%

Amount Per 100 g
Calories	403.45 Kcal (1689 kJ)
Calories from fat	208.54 Kcal
		% Daily Value*
Total Fat	23.17g	990%
Cholesterol	34.89mg	323%
Sodium	341.65mg	395%
Potassium	17.83mg	11%
Total Carbs	50.14g	464%
Sugars	29.17g	3240%
Dietary Fiber	0g	0%
Protein	3.28g	182%
Vitamin C	0.2mg	9%
Iron	2.9mg	450%
Calcium	41.8mg	116%

* Percent Daily Values are based on a 2000 calorie diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower depending on your calorie needs.
Find out how many calories should you eat.