1. Line the bottom and 2 long sides of a 9 1/4 X 3 nonstick loaf pan with a piece of waxed paper, allowing a 1 overhang on both sides. Standing ladyfingers on end, line the sides and ends of the pan with the flat side facing inches There should be about 8 ladyfingers on each side and 3 on each end with no gaps. Set aside.
2. Strain the pineapple, reserving juice. Pour pineapple into a large bowl. Pour 1/2 cup of the juice into a 1-cup glass measure. Pour remaining juice into the bowl with the pineapple and refrigerate. Sprinkle gelatin over the 1/2-cup juice and let soften 5 minutes. Stir. Microwave on HIGH for 15-20 seconds to dissolve gelatin. Stir to dissolve completely.
3. Stir jam into pineapple. Add cream of coconut and gelatin mixture to pineapple, stirring to combine. Refrigerate, stirring several times, for 5-7 minutes or until mixture mounds. (If pineapple and cream of coconut gave not been prechilled, mixture will take longer to mound.).
4. In large bowl, beat 1 1/4 cups of the heavy cream with 4 tbsp of the confectioners' sugar until stiff peaks form. Fold into pineapple mixture. Carefully pour into center of prepared pan, spreading top evenly. Mixture should just reach tops of ladyfingers. Gently tap pan once or twice on counter to remove air pockets. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate 6 hours or until firm.
5. To serve, remove plastic, turn upside down onto serving platter. Carefully remove wax paper. In medium-size bowl, bear remaining 1/2 cup cream and remaining 2 tbsp confectioners' sugar until stiff peaks form. Spread on top. Sprinkle with toasted coconut.
6. * To toast coconut, spread it in a shallow pan. Bake at 350°F, stirring often, for 7-10 minutes until lightly golden.