4999 traditional years dinner Recipes

pork shoulder or 3 1/2 lbs pork butt, trimmed of fat and cut up, water, onion, quartered, garlic cloves, minced, salt, red chili sauce (see (to be used with traditional tamales) for ), shortening, masa harina, baking powder, dried corn husks (about 8 inches long)

christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

qts water (approx ), good sized boneless country style pork ribs, fourteen oz cans of chicken broth, potatoes cut to bite size, carrots cut to bite size, rutabaga cut to bite size, cabbage , about 4 or 5 inches diameter, quartered

macaroni shells and cheese, dinner mix, chopped onion, butter, divided, cooked cubed chicken, frozen peas, thawed, mayonnaise, seasoned bread crumbs

extra lean ground beef, kraft macaroni and cheese mix, dinner, stewed tomatoes, undrained, frozen green pea, milk, kraft shredded low-moisture part-skim mozzarella cheese

refrigerated crescent dinner rolls, frozen vegetables, cooked chicken, chopped, chicken gravy, shredded cheddar cheese, onion, chopped, pepper

sauerkraut , juice and all, water, apples , julienned, sweet variety, red onion, sliced thin, all-purpose flour , sifted, baking powder, salt, milk, vegetable oil, pork tenderloin, fat trimmed, cut into 3-4 inch squares, turkey kielbasa , cut into 4 inch pieces, low fat all beef hot dogs, cut in half, chicken broth , fat free, water, garlic clove, minced, red onion, sliced, salt , to taste, pepper , to taste

fresh minced carp (not frozen). remember: this is the traditional recipe. remove head and bones for the sauce., chopped onion, salt, sugar. ( yes! you read it right )., pepper ., eggs, spoons of matzoh meal . if you can tsp find it , use bread crumbs, head and bones of the carp , (or ask your butcher or fishmonger to do it for you )., sliced onion ., salt ., sliced carrots ., sugar ., black pepper ., water

dinner rolls (small round rolls), chili (about 1/4 cup of per roll, use your favorite for this, just not a thin it needs to), olive oil flavored cooking spray, monterey jack cheese (or any favorite ), sour cream, cilantro, fresh and chopped as a garnish

light butter, softened, minced fresh chives, black pepper, whole-wheat dinner rolls

hamburger patties , (7, quarter-lb patties, cooked), masterpiece steak seasoning , divided, butter, divided, minced garlic, bell pepper, any color, coarsely chopped, mushrooms, coarsely chopped, zucchini, sliced, onion powder, stewed tomatoes, chopped , including liquid, beef broth, spaghetti sauce , traditional, whole wheat penne pasta

backyard beauties tomatoes, eggplants, buffalo mozzarella , balls, garlic cloves, chopped, basil leaves , chiffonade, year aged balsamic vinegar, baby mixed salad greens, kosher salt, black pepper

extra-virgin olive oil, year old balsamic vinegar, arugula, cleaned and stemmed, sliced pieces of proscuitto di parma, parmigiano-reggiano cheese, salt and fresh ground black pepper

olive oil, minced shallots, minced garlic, cooked green lentils, chopped green onions, chopped tomatoes, seeded and peeled, veal stock, salt and pepper, year old balsamic vinegar, tuna steaks, olive oil, cracked toasted coriander seed, parsnip puree, warm, chopped green onions, sizzled leeks (fried julienne leeks), essence , recipe follows, paprika, salt, garlic powder, black pepper, onion powder, cayenne pepper, dried leaf oregano, dried thyme

margarine or 2 tbsp butter, seasoning, packet (traditional chex brand party mix seasoning packet), your favorite chex brand cereals (corn, rice, and or or wheat), peanuts, prezel stick

active dry yeast, melted butter (for dinner rolls only) (optional), shortening (for dinner rolls only) (optional), egg, water , plus, water (70-80 f), vegetable oil, bread flour, sugar, salt

sweetened condensed milk, almond extract, coconut, pillsbury big & flaky refrigerated crescent dinner rolls